so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
did i walk over a car last night?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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