hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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