bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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