Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize