Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
