i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
