My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
This baby is an asshole
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
