I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
A+ Viking dick
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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