You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
