doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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