hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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