How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
