the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
