I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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