I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
