i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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