one might say we're banned from that church
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
