I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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