Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
so much tequila, so little girl.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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