I got chris browned last night
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I could make wine with my vomit
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
