But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
