everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
