What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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