Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Come share oat with me in your robe
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
