Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
