I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I could fuck to npr.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
