He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
