wanna go halves on a baby?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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