Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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