the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
