it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
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