I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
