You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize