Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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