I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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