Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
