do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
