my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
She bit a glass in half.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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