Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize