Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
where am i from again
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
