Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
