I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
