I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
