I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
