and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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