What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
