I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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