before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
