i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
