4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize